Hi - I'm a NYer with a friend from murcia. She's getting married this year and I'm going. I'm very confused about what the appropriate etiquette is for gifts and what to expect the wedding to be like. What is an appropriate gift amount, and do Spaniards register? Thank you!

Hi there! And welcome to our ALL SPAIN Message Board! I've moved your topic here to the "About Spain" forum category as it deals with Spanish customs.

I've conducted a search and you'll find the following threads regarding Spanish weddings especially useful & relative. I/we welcome new/fresh input on the topic as well:

" Spanish weddings " (a long, 2-page topic)

" Need Help!! What do I wear at a Spanish wedding? "

Saludos, MadridMan

About the gifts...I've seen some pretty hefty sums of money for gifts at Spanish weddings...upwards of 250 euros (and I didn't see any other types of gifts). One of my friends registered but she worked at the Corte Ingles. A rule of thumb (can't remember where I heard this) is that you should pay for your meal (which can cost anywhere from $100+ per person. I'm sure your friends will be sensitive to the fact you are paying to go to their wedding so I wouldn't stress about it, anyone who expects a gift doesn't deserve one. When I got married we received everything from nothing to $1000+ (but cash from all Spaniards). So, as you can see, anything goes.

It's pretty common for us to ask he or she who is getting married if they prefer to receive a present or cash. Most people rather get cash in which case 120 - 180 € should do fine. Some people have a "lista de bodas" (sorry, I don't know the name in english), that means you can choose any present from a list the bride and groom have selected. Most people do that in "El Corte Inglés", and you can pay for your present online.

I hope it helped. This year I have to go to 8 weddings, so I guess I am a experienced guest

I think it also depends on which region the people who are getting married are from.

For example it's very common for weddings in Valencia to include a bank account number on a separate card which is included with the invitation. Most people then simply make a bank transfer to that account annoting that it's for the wedding, etc. and the bride/groom don't have to worry about wedding gifts the day of the wedding.

I have been to two weddings in Valencia, and the first time I received an invitation, I was a bit taken aback, but quickly learned that it was quite common there. I don't know if Murcia, being along the Mediterranean coast as well, has a similar tradition. Such does not exist in Madrid.

Years ago, cash only was pretty much the norm. However nowadays, bridal registries (listas de boda as Jasmadrid mentioned) are becoming more and more common. It's always a good idea to ask your friend if s/he is registered anywhere. As Nevado suggested, just about anything goes...although it's highly doubtful that your friend will be expecting anything from you if you make the trip to the wedding.