Hi there,
I have been invited to a wedding in Spain. It's in the evening, and that's all I know. Can anyone give me the run down of the appropriate dress for a woman to wear. Colors, long/short, fancy. Also, I'm not even Catholic so I have no idea how the ceremony will be. Length of time, etc... Anyone info about a typical wedding would be GREATLY appreciated

he he, funny, I think it's not so different from the film Four weddings and a funeral, although it's not so usual that women wear hats, but it depends on how snob or rich they are. I think that anything smart is appropriate.
Here you can find some photos of president Aznar's daughter wedding :
http://www.hola.com/moda/2002/09/11/isabelelegante

They voted for Isabel as the most smart. I preferred the beautiful Inés Sastre, although it's a little bit cheeky?, link in the photo and you will see the other models (Inés is the 3rd)

The ceremony will be 40'-50' long and then people wait outside until all the godfathers and witness sign. Then people use to throw rice or flowers on the new married.

Miguelito,
Muchas gracias!

ceremony will depend on if they choose to do the full mass (with comunion) or just the marriage ceremony (the latter will be shorter!)

Dress nice! Formal but you don't have to go black tie formal- go on what you know on the couple getting married- and don't be afriad to ask the person who invited you! Wear nice but COMFORTABLE shoes! You're going to be doing a lot of dancing! Depending on the church- should you decide to go strapless, make sure you take a shawl or something to cover your shoulders- its one of those catholic things- you'll see people who don't, but you really should cover them up whilst in the sancturary. Other than that, its pretty much the same as in the US- but don't expect a full procession with bridesmaids etc. Its unusual and those weddings that do have it is following american tradition. About the rice, don't worry about bringing any- usually someone from the family will be in charge of passing that or rose petals around for people to toss Also, its also not typical to give favors as in the US- Tradition is that they pass out cigaretts for the women, and cigars for the men. You will not be forced to smoke them! So no cultural pressure with that if you're a nonsmoker

Oh! Colors! No white, (for obvious reasons) and NO red and DEFINATELY I would not recommend black. Its like saying you don't approve- its a color of mourning. The red, well... that's pretty self explainatory. Any other color should do.

Have fun!

Hey, Espe3: How about hats? Back in my day, ladies who attended the wedding ceremony at the Church but were not part of the Wedding Party used to rent and wear very nice hats to weddings.

It made for some nice photos for the paparazzi (i.e., free lance photographers who show up in front of the Church and take lots of photos, none of which the wedding couple is obliged to buy).
P.S.
I got married in Madrid and some of the paparazzi photos were a lot nicer than the 'studio' photos we had contracted for ... Now, I guess it's VCR but remember your U.S. VCR (NTSB format) may not be viewed on a Spanish TV.

Contrary to what Espe writes, I think that Spanish weddings are much more formal than American weddings....and not all American weddings can be classified as the same. What I am trying to say is that the "style" of accepted dress at an American (USA) wedding varies greatly from geographic location. Obviously the bigger cities, more specifically the east coast, tend towards more formal style dressing. But I have been to American weddings in upstate New York and out west in Wyoming, and believe me, by the way some women dressed, I thought they were going to a picnic!

I have also been to a couple of weddings here in Spain. One was bicultural (Spanish/German), smaller garden wedding... but the guests still tended to dress formally. The other was rather large 600+ guests ... also formally dressed. At both weddings, the women were presented with favors, not cigarettes.

When my husband (Spanish) and I got married (in the States) his sisters were more formally dressed in long or longer dresses with matching shawls, shoes and bags... but no hats! We did favors in the American tradition and also passed Cuban cigars to both the men and women .

Chica, I didn't say that Spanish weddings were less formal than American weddings. Let me clarify, I ment as far as the ceremony, it will be similiar to an American wedding. Mostly I wanted to refer to the Bridal procession- it is not our tradition to have bridesmaids or groomsmen. This has nothing to do with how guests are or are not dressed. Its hard to tell someone what to wear without knowing their style or background. If its an evening wedding, the dress for a women should be longer- but it doesn't have to be to the floor- however, depending on the time of year, if the reception is indoor-outdoor etc. and what one is most comfortable in, the legnth of the dress will vary. Best bet is to ask the person who gave the invite and get a better idea. If you have a crowd that is more upper class, certain things may be expected, or if its a more informal crowd they may not have a preference!

Oh! About the food. It tends to always be a sit down. Buffets are not at all common and again, if its done in that style, its copying an American tendancy.

About the hats- no. Nowadays its optional and not all that common unless its something like the ex given before Aznar's daughter. Covering the shoulders is different. You CAN wear a strapless dress that is very formal- I wore one to a black tie- but again, had something to cover the shoulders.

Style of clothing? Fancy, definitely. Classy or elegant, even better. It can be a dress, a suit, skirts, even pants,….as long as they're formal, stylish and you look good on them.
Colours? Both white and black are no-nos indeed, I personally don't see the problem with red.
Prints? They are all right, they can be romantic and feminine; however, in Spain we tend to wear dresses with prints that are soberer than the ones other European women (specially Scandinavian) dare to wear in these sort of occasions. Think royal weddings, it's like a “the flashier dress gets to leave earlier contest”( I hear these are boooring events, he, he!). :p
Huh…”sexiness”? (keep it contained girls, he, he!) Decorum, please, we're talking about a Catholic church ceremony!* :o
Long/medium/short? Depends on the guests' “'pierna' situation”. In any case "medias'(tights) are a must.
Hats? Never for evening weddings if you ask me, it's silly, they “supposedly” have a purpose, don't they?
Shoes? This is the toughest by far. Every lady knows that finding a pair of new high-heeled shoes that actually allow you to bare or even enjoy all the afterwards partying truly IS Mission Impossible!

*(Here's where shawles or "chales', as we call them, come in “super-handy”.)

P.S.: Hey Barry!, I guess The Countess would have been the perfect adviser regarding this question for expert lessons on overall "estilismo' and general etiquette; jewellery, accessories, etc….

I forgot to tell you, all the girls use to take a ridicoulous purse, I've never know what they carry inside, but it's a must.

Miguelito, can't you guess, reaaallyyy?

What an interesting thread.

I've been to four weddings -- Málaga, Bilbao, Lekeitio and Madrid --in Spain and all of them have been quite memorable. All were of close friends in California, but were married in España. For men one is almost always in a suit, and women are dressed incredibly smart.

One of the weddings was held in the church in this picture.

linguistar, you'll have a great time at your friend’s wedding. I'm already looking forward to my next in Asturias, to be held at the beginning of this winter.

Well pim, each girl is one world, so... you'll probably carry some mint leaves to be sure that you will drink some mojitos!!
Don't you?

Ha, ha, ha! Miguelito, good one! But I'm a wine type of girl, so maybe what I carry around should be a few grapes?

Miguelito, you are clearly an "aficionado de la belleza." I checked out the photo of Ines that you referred to, and she was radiant. I commend your good eye. -OhMike

OhMike, it was easy to choose.

Sorry, I have no time to translate this, but very funny for those of you who speak Spanish, and very close to the reality of Spanish weddings:


Estoy un poco fastidiao'. Acabo de recibir una invitación de boda,
ya me dirán si no es para estar jodido. ¡Será posible! ¡Es que se
te queda la misma cara que cuando te llega una multa! ¡Hale, a soltar pasta!
Porque hay que ver como se desbarra en las bodas. Sobre todo las
mujeres, que no solo se disfrazan de paquete de caramelos,
algunas hasta se ponen fiambrera en la cabeza, que las ves y dices:
"¿Mamá? ¿Eres tú o el soldado Ryan?".
Lo más raro es ese bolsito diminuto que llevan todas,
"¡Anda, una almeja metálica!". ¿Que llevan ahí,
una compresa extraplana? Sin alas, claro, porque asomarían.
Si es que es muy fuerte eso de las bodas.
Una de las cosas que mas odio de las bodas son las esperas:
¡te tiras media hora en la puerta de la iglesia con las manos
sudando llenas de arroz, que cuando salen los novios, lo que les
tiras es arroz a la cubana...! Ahora, que los peores son los niños,
que tiran el arroz a la cara, con una mala hostia:
"En el ojo, macho", le he dao' en el ojo....". Y el novio, ahí, aguantando.
Odio las bodas. Yo, en la ultima no conocía ni a la que se casaba
y cuando fui a darle el beso de rigor, me tuve que presentar:
- Soy Floren, el hijo de la tía Tere, la que no se habla con el abuelo.
- Ah, encantada, gracias por venir.
Si es que da igual, la novia no se entera, va como drogada, le podría haber dicho:
- ¿Me prestas un par de kilitos para la entrada de un piso?
- Ah, encantada, gracias por venir.
O:
- Soy el violador del Ensanche, vengo a enseñarte el pito.
Ella hubiera dicho igualmente:
- Encantada, gracias por venir.
Lo que mas odio de las bodas en el momento del traslado al banquete.
Tu madre te coloca a tus tías, pero como tu coche es de dos puertas,
las tienes que meter a empujones. El vestido se les sube a las caderas
y van todo el camino enseñando la faja. Pero a ellas todo les hace gracia:
- Nene, sube la ventanilla, uuuhh, ji, ji, ji, que me despeino,
y sigue, sigue al tio Juan, que se sabe el camino, uuhhh, ji, ji, ji.
¡Ji,ji! ¡Hala, fila de doce coches, tocando la bocina! Y como el
primero se pase un semáforo... ¡emergencia, emergencia! Todo Dios sacando el móvil:
- Atención, hemos girado a la izquierda, veis al tío Juan, egggg.
Nosotros estamos dando vueltas a la rotonda, eggggg, cogiendo inercia,
egggg, me copias, me copias... Pato rojo a pato azul, hemos perdido
al tío Juan, tío Juan contesta, cambio, eggggg.
Da igual, es un desastre. Cuando llegas, el tío Juan lleva dos horas
sentado y encima te dice:
- ¿Dónde os habéis metido, [censored]?
Lo único que esta bien organizado en las bodas es el reparto
de los idiotas: ponen uno en cada mesa. Pero el resto es un descontrol:
están entrando la tarta y a tu mesa aun no han llevado el chuletón.
Yo siempre me he preguntado porque cortan la tarta con un sable,
¿que sentido tiene? Como no sea por tener un arma a mano para cuando entren los de la tuna...
¿Y que me dicen del vídeo? Se acerca el de la cámara y todo el mundo
se cree que esta en El Semáforo: el idiota se pone una servilleta en
la cabeza, el tío Juan canta la jota de siempre y una de las tías llora:
- Hijos míos, que os queráis mucho y os respetéis siempre...
¡Hombre, por favor! ¿Esto es lo que pasa el día mas feliz de tu vida?
¡Es todo muy fuerte! Porque después llegan las mujeres con peladillas
envueltas en un trozo de tul y paquetes de cigarrillos gritando:
- Fúmate uno mujer, que estamos de boda.
Y de pronto te encuentras a tu vieja echando humo por la nariz como si fuera una vaporeta.
A nosotros, en cuanto nos descuidamos, nos colocan un puro.
Yo, a la tercera calada, empiezo a ponerme blanco y lo tiro.
Pero allí están los vigilantes de puros, tan atentos ellos:
- ¿Ya te has fumado el puro? ¡Dale otro al chaval y una copa de coñac,
pa' que se haga un hombre!
Un hombre, un hombre... ¡hombre, no me jodas!
¡Y el baile! Eso es lo mas fuerte. Lo peor es cuando el tío de la
novia la saca a bailar un pasodoble. El tío va to resudao'
con la camisa pegada al cuerpo, le planta la manaza en la espalda,
le sube el vestido medio metro y canturrea mordiendo el puro:
- La 'ente 'anta con ardor que 'iva España, nana na nana nana na,
y España es la mejor, tara ran tan taran tara ro.
Lo que menos entiendo es por que los novios pasan de mesa en mesa preguntando:
- ¿Que tal? ¿Habéis comido bien?
A ti te dan ganas de decirles:
- Pues no, la comida era una mierda, y no he dejado de soltar pasta
entre la corbata, la liga y la tuna... ¡Y encima me habéis puesto al lado del bafle!
Pero no, les dices que todo ha estado perfecto. Y así, con una mentira,
los novios comienzan su vida de casados. Claro que no será la única...
En fin, ¡que vivan los novios, pero a mi que no me inviten a mas bodas!.

Miguelito, that is VERY funny, and yes, very close to reality! I was picturing scenes in my mind from my own experiences at Spanish weddings the whole time I was reading, and thinking -oh yes - so true!! The thing is, I love Spanish weddings, partially because they are so predictable!

I can't imagine how it could be translated without losing a lot, though. Who wrote it?

I received it by internet.
There's a group called El club de la Comedia that write monologues for talks shows (I think you call them). Probably they're the autors, or maybe any others, now there's like a fashion to write this kind of comic monologues.

They're called stand-up comics.

Thank you pim

Can someone please tell me what "smart" means when refering to style of dress? Does smart mean formal? Sincerely your confused American,
Amanda

smart = sharp

If the ceremony is Catholic, then expect it to take at least an hour, maybe a little more. since Spain is nominally a Catholic country it will likely be a wedding Mass, and communion will be offered (this is for Catholics only!)

Appropriate dress would be semiformal. I know that in Latin America (probably the same goes for Spain) the locals can be offended if one enters a church dressed casually.

If there is anything else just ask.

I am going to be attending a wedding in the Galacia region on 26 Julio 2003. I know it is going to be very hot and I was told by the groom that it is "Smart Formal." I am Catholic, so I am familiar with the shawls in church, but I am still unsure how formal I need to be dressed. Also, are stockings (tights or pantyhose) a must? Thank You for any insight, my date is of NO help with the dress code. Also, in general, what is the dress code in Spain. Do people wear shorts and tanktops?

Thanks Again - Culturally Challenged, Kara

Shorts are not the norm unless you're at the beach. Tank tops are ok.

As for the wedding- in summer, at least if your somewhat tan- yes, you can skip the hose.

Ask who invited you to the wedding to give you an example of what some of the people are talking about wearing (or if you know someone else that's attending). That's usually the best way- especially since everyone's definition of Formal is different. But I can guarentee you its not Black Tie dress! So maybe that will help as a guide.

hey everybody

its going to be hot in galicia?!
i dont think so.
youre stereotyping.
oh what the hell
youre not the only one whos has done this

Mike- sorry to burst your bubble- but in the summer (during the day), yes it does get hot- its just more tolerable in Galicia. Although I must say, that the water in Galicia if you're going swimming is FREEZING it took me 3 days just to get up to my knees! :o

At night it does get considerbly cool- keep in mind you're in the mountains- so you shouldn't dress to summery for the wedding- definately have something to cover with if its outdoors.

hey everybody

espe3

daytime temperatures in the lower and mid 70s and seldom exceeding 77 degrees ?
you kidding me?
thats not hot thats more like pleasant with little trace of hot.
or maybe youre referring to orense?
i tell you for real that the rest of galicia is rarely hot.only orense but not always though.
why do you think the water is so cold there.
i asked my dad yesterday,i said this lady on MM'S said galicia is hot during the summer.he said shes probably referring to orense.i said oh yeah dad ill go tell her right now.

I went to Vigo and Bueu. It was HOT! and the water- freezing, because, well IT IS! The water (ocean not the rias- I didn't swim in the rias so I don't know) is artic cold- so once you're used to it, its fine- but I'm not, and the water is like having little needles prick at you- not bad once you get over the shock- but not something I'd recommend diving head first into!

Now on the other hand- my mom's friend who is from there, doesn't have any problem getting into the water and swimming around! I couldn't do it! :p

Hi everyone...I was just in Huesca for a day trip yesterday, and in la Catedral de Huesca, there were weddings after weddings after weddings. We saw the bride & groom comming out, with all their family and friends, and MOST of the women were wearing either red, white, or black dresses. Only the older women (70/80s) were wearing skirts, but ALL the women (younger, older, wearing dresses or skirts) had some sort of shawl to cover their shoulders, and they were ALL in either black or white. Maybe this is because black and white are really popular this summer, but I found it really strange that most of you had said that white, black and especially red were not appropriate...

Marisa- depends on the kind of wedding... it could have been the recommended dress for the wedding- as for the red- well, that's very daring to wear- the thing about colors is that nobody generally (unless otherwise specified) but the bride should wear white. Black is a color of mourning and well, there you go- but again, depending on the dress and the type of wedding- and red- its an attention getter so again its a color not supposed to be worn by ettiquette as you're not supposed to draw attention away from the bride. Not to say they CAN'T be worn- but shouldn't.

My mom just got back from my cousins wedding- if I figure out how to do it, I'll post from that and another wedding I went to to show examples of dress.

Linguistar:
Lucky you. Have you been invited to the reception? Whatever you decide to wear, my guess is that you will eat very well.

In several decades of visiting Spain the best meal I ever had was at a wedding reception. Provided for 200 persons by people who were certainly not wealthy, I left happily stuffed with entremeses, langostinos, the best cordero asado I've ever eaten, washed down with good vino, champagne and after-dinner brandy and cordials. The after-dinner dancing went on and on. Amazing. It certainly reinforced the Spaniards' reputation for hospitality--at least for me. If you luck into the same, you will find it a memorable experience.

hey everybody

marisa
when are you going to start the camino de santiago?
you might get there late.

hey everybody

marisa
when are you going to start the camino de santiago?
you might get there late.

I have a question about wearing red in weddings...I believe I am well informed about etiquette and I have always heard that you dont wear either white or black to a wedding, I never heard anything about red. As for it drawing too much attention...I guess as much as any other bright color. Anyway, I am curious to know where that comes from, having been in weddings both in the north and the south in Spain, I saw many women, especially this year, wearing red and it was perfectly fine. is it ok to wear it in the US? what about different parts of Spain? It seems to be fine in both Asturias and Sevilla...

One more thing about weddings, I have observed the tendency lately that people go more and more formally dressed than before, even wear long dresses, evening dresses, to morning weddings, which should not be done. I have seen it here, in Asturias, has anybody else noticed the trend?

Jos-
I wouldn't say it was so much a trend- as people not having much fashion sense! Yes, even Spain there are fashion victims! :p