Ah. Ninas,

When did you quit beating your wife/kids?

If you understand the total absurdity of the question above, you'd understand our position. First of all, before I present any evidence as to the answers to these questions, where is the evidence to the questions in the first place? Don't you think that they might be a little baited?

But let me try anyway, sans evidence if you will.

1. If the U.S. is so rich, why does it need help from other nations?

I really haven't heard that it "needed, or even requested anything. God bless those that felt the need to send them.

2. Why did it take FEMA so long to respond to the disaster?

FEMA is a bumbling, incompetent government agency, you know, like homeland security, Congress, etc.

3. Something about Bush prohibiting pictures of recovery victims?

Well, I had to eat breakfast when they kept showing pictures of that unfortunate woman Terry Shiavo, and to tell you the truth, my food didn't stay down well. Sorry for the insensitivity, but. I would hope that most people have more commom sense that to want to see pictures of bloated corpses in the morning with their cereal. Lord knows they would be shown over, and over...ad nauseum.

4. And let's see, where are we going to find money for all the promises President Bush made?

I think a good start would be to trim some of the pork out of the recent Highway bill that was recently passed. Other than that, Ted Kennedy's bar tab would probably foot the bill.

Any more concerns?

Gazpacho is always here to help.

Gazpacho, Gazpacho, simmer down ole buddy. Think of all the booze tax we are collecting on Ted's bar tabs. That alone should be enough to rebuild ten houses. Do you truly want think of what he would be like sober? :p :p

Right you are Desert Dweller, and in more ways than one.

Over a good night sleep I came up with a couple of more ways to raise money for the promises that President Bush made to the victims of the flooding.

1. We could try to sell Louisiana back to the French, if they don't mind it back a little soggy and in control of the Mexican troups.

2. We could try to retrieve everything that the Clinton's stole from the White House. That might be a waste of time though, seeing that they'll just be right back in. Anybody know where bubba is?

Ninas, why would you ask a right winger those questions at this time? You know Propaganda Minister Goebels (Carl Rove "Bush's Brain" ) hasn't come up with the right spin yet, he's to busy running the country while "Minnie Me" is out "just savin lives" But maybe I can help, your question about the country's resources is a good one. We now have the biggest deficit in our country's history and "Minnie Me" still wants to lower taxes on the wealthiest citizens only, good timing, it must be a rebirth of the "trickle down theory" yea remember that crap! Oh for the days of a strong president and good times like the ninety's, If Clinton would agree to be President now I'm sure he would win in a landslide,and I'd have no problem buying all his aides new kneepads as an incentive. Secondly Fema took so long to respond because it's leader was an appointed political hack with no experience except being an assistant to the head of the "American Arabian Horse Ass." and the president was in San Diego being his usual "bagman" for the Republican Party! And Field Marshall Goering, err Vice President Cheney was of course missing as usual.(No leadership,nothing gets done!) Thirdly, no photos or info on damages or casualty's ? What's new,we have a fourth estate now that is scared and by and large gutless.
ANd about garnering funds to pay for this tragic situation, Hey I got an idea! Let's beat Bush and his Beer Garden buddies to the punch and start selling "Pardons" to his and the right wings slimey cohorts like "Kenny Baby" Ken Lay and his Enron crime partners, maybe the guys from World Com, huh!,might as well sell pardons to the Halliburton/KBR guys now as they will need them. And I got a brainstorm,how about "Minnie Me" selling autographed photos of himself in his flight uniform (codpiece and all) under the "Mission Accomplished" banner. ANd I pray that Hurricane Rita spares everyone more grief.

Fulano,

Is that how Pravda sees it?

There you go again with those great jokes, gazpacho. I know I speak for all of us when I say that your tongue-in-cheek comments make us roll with laughter.

Democrats: Tax-and-Spend
Republicans: Spend-but-don't-Tax

Democrats: Tax everyone equally
Republicans: Tax only the lower 99% of the population

Democrats: More passive and seeking world harmony
Republicans: If it moves, KILL IT. Kill it twice if we can make money on it

Democrats: competitive bidding for government contracts
Republicans: Ah, just give it to Haliburton and our other cronies

Democrats: pay the prevailing wage to workers
Republicans: pay FEMA full-scale and they'll pay workers less than the prevailing wage

Democrats: "Let's all just get along."
Republicans: "Do what we say or we'll sanction your commi butts - or maybe you'd prefer 'Shock and awe' to rain down on you!"

Democrats: Raise taxes to pay for healthcare & build infrastructure (those crazy Canadians are so silly - they have such miserable live and terrified with rampant crime)
Republicans: Don't raise taxes but pay for pet projects (i.e. unnecessary wars) by cutting spending (again) on frivolous programs like education

Democrats: vigilant over environmental concers including global warming
Republicans: Global warming? What's that? It doesn't exist. We've just concluded an independent study and it's nothing but a farce. Besides, if it DID exist, it would harm our economy by liquidating jobs (at least the few remaining which we haven't sent to other countries - yet). Better to let our children deal with this fictional problem (along with the deficit) as well as a skyrocketing percentage of skin cancer, rising seas, disappearing coastlines and useable agriculture land, drought, and year-round summer in Alaska!

Democrat politicians: Give to Hurricane Katrina relief
Republican politicians: Give to Hurricane Katrina relief (hey, what do *I* get out of this?) and we'll give most of that to Haliburton and our other non-competitive-bidding buddies

Democrats: Fiscal responsibility
Republicans: Huh?

Democrats: Halt nuclear proliferation
Republicans: Halt nucular perliferation (except for us. he he he... )

Yup. It's true. (joking here) We democrats are a bunch of communist moon bats and will bring the eventual end of civilisation.

http://www.RedCross.org/
http://www.bushclintonkatrinafund.org/

Saludos, MadridMan

Thank you MadridMan. And Fulano, you are so right on. Your suggestion about the knee pads made my day. But, you know, we've got to be more careful, Bill has a heart condition now.....Actually, they thought Cheney had a heart condition, but they did more investigation and discovered that's impossible--he doesn't actually have a heart.

Hey will one of you guys head down to the nearest FDA office and tell them to get their act together.

Read the rest of this Mirror.co.uk article here .

MadridMan,

You forgot one.

Republicans: Bush lied. No WMD's in Iraq.

Thanks, gazpacho. Let me add that one:

Republicans: Bush lied. No WMD's in Iraq.
Democrats: We knew that already along with the rest of the world

Saludos, MadridMan