Hi!
I've never really posted before but have been reading for a LONG time. This topic has been I think mentioned before under a different title but I just wanted to comment on it. Nuria, I read a post you wrote a long time ago about the way people here in the US look away when you make eye contact and seem to stare anywhere but at a person and totally agree! Its an old topic I know but its just that I saw the post today. I was born in New Jersey but my mom is Spanish so we travel, thankfully , to Espana quite frequently. But that, the making eye contact, smiling at people who are passing you by on the sidewalk , is part of what makes me love Spain so much, the fact that people are so , I don't know ...open, maybe?! I wonder if anyone else has noticed this as well or feels the same way.... Hope to hear what some of you think

Hi JanetP!! Welcome to the group. You'll find LOTS of opinions/experiences about this in the "About Spain" forum in the long " staring " thread. I've addded yours there. Thanks for sharing and keep those experiences coming!

Saludos, MadridMan

I have to agree with that, although there are some places in the U.S. that are like that too.

You know, something similar that I liked in Salamanca was the way that strangers say "que tal?" to you in the elevator.

I too, have cosidered this issue since I read the original posting and my conclusion is to point out the differences in the cultural premises of the two,...f'rinstance, in the U.S., the pervading raison d'etre is to "GET", so people look at you to see what they can get; whereas in Spain, the purpose is to "have" and so people can look at you from their own space and enjoy what they have while admiring what you have ,but aren't necessarily wanting anything cuz they're happy with what they have,....uh......perhaps I'll think on it somemore........Rev. Mike

Hmmm. Rev. Mike, I think, with all due respect, that I disagree with your assessment of why people stare in the US vs. Spain. I certainly cannot speak for the Spanish practice of staring, but as an American, I do have some ground on which to stand.

It seems, first of all, too complex an issue to simplify to only one reason for which people stare, no matter which country we're talking about. BUT, most of the staring I've witnessed (or done, for that matter) has been out of ignorance or curiosity, or some combination thereof. It's not that I'm looking to GET something out of the person at whom I'm staring, it's that that person is different from me, and I'm curious as to how and why. Staring in this country CAN make a person uncomfortable, and we generally regard it as being rude, but I think (and I'm only guessing) that the reasons people stare in the US and in Spain are probably similar, it's just our attitudes about the practice that are mostly different. In fact, I think that Nuria may have addressed this exact issue previously (maybe in a different thread).

But that's just my opinion.

But Of Course Joy, it's only each of our opinions that we express here, and that we all stare wasn't what I was going for really, it was more in the direction of why is it uncomfortable (and dangerous) here as opposed to Spain. It's only from experience that we learn these things yet funny how so mant of us know about that staring thing here; and in fact have subconsciously noted a difference between locations; but as you say that's just my perception at this moment, and like the weather,...catch the Eleven O'clock Update,...chuckle,chuckle...Rev. Mike

Are we so self conscious that we think people are 'Staring' at us when they are just 'looking' from a: "so that's what they really look like" perspective, or curiousity or astonishment? There's an old joke about a Hassidic Jew walking through a mobilehome park in the deep South. As he departs, he turns to the crowd of curious onlookers that has gathered around him and says: "What's the matter? You never before seen a Yankee?"

Much of what these people (especially older people) see is Alien to them. It's the old
"You ain't from around here" thing.

Here's a cultural factor to consider: The Staring response may have been left in Spain from 700-years of Islamic occupation of the Iberian Peninsula. For some reason, Arabic people tend to stare more than Europeans.

Eddie,
I love watching people passing by. Gran Via is my favourite street(it is better than a movie, it`s the real life) but I think French people like it even more. When I was in Paris I noticed that the seats in every terrace bar are faced to the street walk so you can see everybody. I don`t know if you understand what I mean, nobody was looking to the wall or to the restaurant door. I could see 4 or 5 friends seating in a line just watching. I was very surprised.

Saludos,
Celia



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Celia:
I spent many hours sitting at the Terraza of Cafeteria Iowa, 100m or so north of Goya on Calle Serrano, admiring the tastefully dressed ladies and just 'people watching' in general.
I have done the same from Paris to Marrakech and have found that Madrid is the best place in the world for that time-honored tradition.

In my last trip to home (Spain) the first thing that I noticed was men/women looking at me. At first I felt uncomfortable (I guess that I am getting use to the American way) but then I realized that I was at home and I could be looked and I could look and that didn't mean something bad. Actually a cute guy that I didn't know offered me a cigarrette, I was going to say: Are you crazy? You don't know me, and this is an airport where you are not supposed to smoke. But then I REALIZED I was at Barajas where I can smoke 3 cigarrettes at the same time if I wanted and that the guy might have some interest on me but that didn't mean he was a freak.